Tuesday, January 17, 2017

January 17, 2017

Dear Diary,

Everything in my world is in a tailspin today, which prompted Dr. Morell to up both my Xanax and the anti-seizure meds.  I can never remember the name of the anti-seizure meds, but I know the pills are bluish and boy, do they work!  The last time I took them, I felt like I was in an episode of The Walking Dead.  I had this tremendous burst of energy, leaped out of bed and started staggering into the living room, where (according to Bessie) I tried to eat a couch pillow.

That's really powerful stuff! Fun, but you have to be careful.

Anyway, the good doctor doubled me up because Bill -- in my  absence -- decided to shut down the money mill Clinton Foundation and the Clinton Global Initiative or whatever they're calling it these days.  I was furious when I heard about it, but as soon as the meds kicked in, I was able to discuss it calmly.

I was very angry that the organization was closing, because we were doing some very important work. The Foundation was instrumental in raising hundreds of millions of dollars in payoffs donations to help those dirty poor people and make their lives so much better.  For example, there's no way Chel and the Jew could have afforded that $10 million condominium in Manhattan without the Foundation's help.  She's so deserving and the way he loses money, it felt good to know they finally had a roof over their heads with no judgement.

As long as they were no longer homeless, I had Chel pick out a few St. John's outfits and Dolce & Gabama shoes.  I think Bill funneled a few bucks to Mr. Jew Husband on the sly, too.  Hey, these are just young kids, starting out.  It felt good to do something for someone else for a change!

Still, it disheartens me that so many others will go without our help now that the Foundation is closing.  Millions of unfortunate people who were counting on our photo opportunities assistance will now have to fend for themselves.  Who are they going to bribe call when they're hungry for power a decent meal?

I suppose we'll have to cut back, too. Bill says we still have all the lifetime perks from his presidential pension, which is a big relief.  Without that medical plan, I'd be sunk! Whew!

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