Thursday, April 6, 2017

April 6, 2017

Dear Diary,

One of the troubling issues I have with my recovery is that it's the same old thing every day.  It's really boring.  I know that Dr. Morell is doing his best for me, and it does look as if he's hit the right mix by balancing the Zoloft and Lorezapam with just the right amount of Lithium and Prozac.  That man is a genius.  Now if I can just cut down my sleep time, I think I may have turned the corner.  Fourteen hours a day seems a bit excessive.  I feel I may be missing out on things.

Dr. Morell has told Bessie that under no circumstances am I to read any newspapers because they remind me too much of reality may upset me.  So I have to scrounge around for whatever news I can get, which means I have to fish out old editions of the New York Times that Bessie changes out of the parakeet's cage if I want any kind of update.  It's messy but not too bad if you pick off the bird turds and scrape off the rest with your fingernails.

One thing that I've noticed is that ever since the you-know-what, there's been no mention of Black Lives Matter anywhere in the press.  Remember that group?  They were so much fun. What a bunch of characters.  There was a time when someone, somewhere would get roughed up or killed and those kids were real Johnny-On-The-Spot, misspelling their protest signs, throwing bricks through windows and editing video clips to look like they'd been shot on cell phones.  I don't know how they did it, but just about every video they ever staged went super-viral almost as fast as that Rebecca Black singing that "Friday, Friday" song a few years back.  Remember her? I used to love that.  Huma and I would wink and sing it to each other every Thursday, just before our weekend trysts our staff meetings when I was Secretary of State.

I can't be 100% sure, but I have a sneaking suspicion that those poor Black Lives Matter kids aren't around anymore because they finally pissed off Soros. Maybe that whole "let's kill white people" thing ran its course.  I can't say for sure, but one thing I can say is that you don't want to mess with George Soros.  Now there's a real asshole problem.  I've been in the business a long time and if there's one thing you never want to do, it's piss off a former Nazi Jew who's loaded with dough alienate your support base.  During the you-know-what, Soros was super generous, handing out checks like they were candy.  I don't think he gave Black Lives Matter money because he supported them as much as his fear of their kicking his ass commitment to the Democrats' core belief system, which includes throwing bricks through windows when things don't go your way.

I suppose with Carrot Head on the throne in office, Soros doesn't want to throw good money after bad, so Black Lives Matter is out. I hope he bankrolls another group, though.  Maybe dwarves.  We haven't heard from little people in a while.  I'm sure he'll sort it out.  He's a businessman, after all.  And he's really rich.

You'd think with all that money he'd get a facelift or something.  It can't be easy looking at that face in the mirror every morning. Ick.

Subscribe for each day's entry by Email!