Monday, May 8, 2017

May 8, 2017

Dear Diary,

Well, today was a very important step for the women of the world, as the people of France bravely elected their new president.  But I am a little confused:  Is Emmanuel Macron their first woman president or just a really fey, homo-looking, Euro-trash poser?  I'm all for gender confusion, but even I had a tough time figuring out if France had just elected Bruce Jenner in a business suit.

From what I hear, Macron won by a very large margin, which is what was supposed to happen here for a woman last year, except that the French didn't fuck things up the way Podesta did actually got the job done.  I have to find out who Macron's hit men enforcers campaign workers were.

Unless my meds are really off, this French thing seemed to be one very strange contest, with the man being the woman and the woman being the man:  Macron is very young and kind of weird and not exactly the John Wayne of the French Republic.  It doesn't help his image as a weenie that he married his mother his high school drama teacher.  On the other side, Marine LePen was more macho and can probably bench press a bus, but she's blonde and I only find brunettes attractive.  So I understand that the people of France had a very difficult choice.

Form where I sit, I have to ask, "What does it matter?"  The day after all the drama, Paris still has the same streets, same bridges and same lovely museums it always did.  The only difference is that now, muslim refugees are taking dumps in the streets, peeing on bridges and raping white women just outside the museums.

Why are people so afraid of change?  They should embrace it, like we do. We don't discriminate who rapes our women or poops in our streets -- isn't that what a true democracy is all about?

I am very relieved to know that Angela Merkel Macron will be taking France down the road to ruin the path of European unity.  By stabilizing the Euro, Bessie can buy that stinky cheese and wine for a lot less at Costco, which is good for their economy and our portfolio, since we bought Costco stock back during the Obama recession. Our capital gains are huge, but Bill says we can't sell any of it because the account is in both our names. He's waiting for Dr. Morell to refill my Librium prescription and then I can sign all the papers that hand all our assets over to his Library Fund.

I never understood high finance. I just give Bessie the VISA and she comes back with groceries.  I should have a lot of airline miles by now.  Maybe I should go on a vacation somewhere.  But not Paris.  It's really smelly there now.

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