Friday, August 11, 2017

August 11, 2017

Dear Diary,

One of the reasons I never had a second child was that I never wanted Chel to feel ignored. That was one reason. The other was that I just couldn't bear the thought of Webb Hubbell getting all sweaty rubbing up against me again. Believe me, once was more than enough. I still break out in anal hives just thinking about it.

More to the point, after I nearly split my pelvis whelping Chel, I made an executive decision not to have any more kids because I know how it feels to have your siblings steal all the attention. When I was a little girl, my brothers showed me up every chance they could, bringing home prettier girls than I was able to attract better grades and lettering in sports. Ever since then, diary, I admit I've wanted the attention for myself, which is why I so wanted to be queen win the you-know-what.

That's sort of how I feel about Nagasaki. While everyone from grade school kids to college seniors are busy learning how to put on hijabs, none of them seems to know that on August 11, 1945, a second atom bomb landed smack dab in the middle of Japan. It was the Nagasaki bomb that really ended the second world war, but Hiroshima gets all the attention. That's just not fair. Hiroshima gets movies made about it and songs written about it. Nagasaki gets bupkis, as the Jews say.

I'm sort of the Nagasaki of the Rodham family. And yes, it still hurts, although the scars on my wrists have actually healed up pretty nicely.

Hiroshima wasn't even the War Department's first choice for the atom bomb. A lot of people don't know that one of the original targets for the atom bomb was Berlin, but by the time a bomb was ready, that part of the war was over. Plus, you have to figure that nobody wanted to nuke a bunch of white people ruin prime Hun real estate for the next thousand years. That stuff soared in value, especially after the wall came down. I told Bill we should invest there, but he was convinced Amway and Herbalife was the way to go. We still have a closet filled with that crap. We didn't make any real money until the Clinton Foundation.  That was a good run.

I suppose we should all take a moment to think about the terrible toll nuclear weapons have taken on humanity. It makes me sad. I could have been the first woman to push the button.

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